I remember having all of these ideas of what being a "grownup" would be like when I got here. Obviously, based on experience... you go through high school, you meet the love of your life in college, you get married, start your career, have kids, and come out on the other hand with an awesome family and sunshine and rainbows. I mean honestly, as much as you can be jealous about anyone for anything, I had a really amazing childhood and my parents have given me so much, and in retrospect there isn't anything else I could have wanted. My problem now is that I don't measure up to these standards I constructed.
College didn't yield a special someone for me, as sure as I was about what I wanted to major in - it hasn't practically worked out as well as I hoped, and kids are a long ways off even though some little voice in the back of my head is saying that I should have them already. I know, you're thinking things can't be all that bad... however I'm in a funk.
Ever since I turned 26 (well actually two weeks before I turned 26) everything has been terrible. I got fired from the job that I thought was going to be my dream job, and then just a short month later I broke two bones in my arm. So I've spent the past weeks not only trying to rehab my arm, but also trying to rehab my broken spirit. I can only hope September was the low point of the year.
Yes, this post has been a long time coming, but I was embarrassed that I failed, I was disappointed in myself and through reflection in my own mind assumed that other people would be disappointed in me as well. Luckily the people whose opinions matter the most to me have been very supportive of me, and now I can focus on proving my strength by getting back on my feet. The rest of it will fall into place in time.
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